insight Archives - Page 2 of 2

Love Nerd: Why Am I Single?

by tiffanyLife, Love Nerd March 10, 2020June 4, 2020No Comments

I’ve asked my self one question over and over. Sometimes I have the answer, other times I’m confused and don’t understand. The repeated question is, “Why am I single?”

I’ve answered this question many ways.

First the answer was I don’t see anyone I want to date. There was never the perfect guy that fell right in front of my face. No obvious suitor came calling and there was no fairy-tale meet cute in the movie of my life.

By the time I realized I was fooling myself by waiting for something romantic to fall into my lap, I was writing “To Love” and trying to build my art business. My excuse changed from, ‘it’s out of my control,’ to ‘I don’t have time.’ I thought I couldn’t do or have both my art career and a romantic partner. There just wasn’t enough time in the day or energy in my soul.

All the while I had a little voice of fear in the back of my mind that said I would only get hurt. Part of me didn’t want to find someone, because I didn’t want the pain of a break up. It took me writing “To Love” to realize that fear though.

I’m happy to say now my excuse is that it takes time. I’m once again trying online dating and praying my eyes are open to the different possibilities. It also helps to be able to see that I have love and support from my friends and family. With them I can overcome every pain or fear that life throws my way. Another thing that helps is that I’m working on being the best version of myself.

Want to learn or read more?

This blog series stems from my book “To Love.” For more information on “To Love” you can also watching my YouTube playlist. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.

Tiff’s Tips: Decide If You Are A Hobbyist or Artist

by tiffanyTiff's Tips March 3, 2020June 4, 2020No Comments

In my mind creative people can fall into 2 camps; the hobbyist and the artist.

The Hobbyist

The Hobbyist is creative for the joy and pleasure of being creative. Their idea of success is just having time to be creative and enjoying it.

Being creative to them is either relaxing or simply a fun time. They do not need anything else out of their art or creativity. The hobbyist is someone who will have another job and is simply being creative because it is their hobby.

It is a simple and pure reason to create art of any type.

The Artist

The Artist is a person who wants a career focused around being creative. Art is more than a hobby to them. It is a passion that they can’t get enough of.

Yes, they enjoy creating and art most likely started as a hobby for them too. It has since grown and changed into something they want to do more of.

Where I fall

I fall into the artist camp. I started as a hobbyist. For most of my life I wrote because it was just something I enjoyed doing. I started to draw and doodle, because it was fun.

The issue I started to face was that I wanted to write more and do more with my visual art too. I never feel like I have enough time to do everything I want to do with my creative career.

I started to make life changes to help me make more time for my creativity. First it was small things, like making sure I had Saturdays to be creative and setting goals for my creativity. Then the changes became bigger, like leaving my office job and the commute, so that I had more time and less mental drain.

Another change I made in order to fall more into the artist camp was that I simply started to refer to my creativity as my art business and my creative career. I switched my brain into realizing and accepting this is the path I’m on.

Whether you chose to be a hobbyist or artist both are valid and can be successful. Just like life your art and creativity is yours. Only you can decide how much time, effort, and emotions you put into.

If you are hobbyist that does not mean you are less passionate about your creativity. It simply means you have decided to keep it as a hobby instead of a career.

This is part of Tiff’s Tips a blog series. I have also done a goal setting video series on YouTube.

Tiff’s Tips: Define Success for yourself

by tiffanyTiff's Tips February 18, 2020June 4, 2020No Comments

Success is defined as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. It is the attainment of popularity or profit. Success is based on achievements and accomplishments. What you aim for and strive to accomplish will be unique to who you are.

You need to define what a successful life looks like to you. Who do you want to be? How do you want your life and art to look? What accomplishments and achievements mean most to you?

No one can define success for your life, except for you. A successful life for me will look very different than your successful life. We are all unique with different passions, personalities, and life styles.

Let Me Share My Definition

In my life success is defined as living a life I’m proud of, where I am allowed to be fully me. This definition will allow me to grow, but also allow contentment as I grow.

I live a successful life by keeping a journal for self-exploration, so that I can keep in touch with who I am at my core.

One reason why I pray and read the Bible daily is so that I can learn more about my spirit/ soul and grow closer to God who made.

Living a successful life for me also means being creative often and sharing my creativity with others.

Notice, I have defined a successful life with things that I can control. I can decide to journal or not. I can focus on building healthy habits or I can ignore those habits. It is up to me.

I learned through goal setting and striving to be a better version of my self that the focus has to be with you. You cannot focus on the achievements, but that what you do to get to the achievements.

This means that it if you want to get to point B, don’t focus on point B. Focus on walking to point B and the steps. You’ll get there, but if you focus on the end goal and achievement it becomes easier and easier to see that you’re not at point B. This is especially true if point B is far far away.

Focus on your habits and what you can control and you’ll get to your successful life.

This is part of Tiff’s Tips a blog series. I have also done a goal setting video series on YouTube.

Introduction: Love Nerd

by tiffanyLove Nerd February 4, 2020January 21, 2020No Comments

I am a Christian, a sister, and a friend. I’m an avid learner and artist. Also, I am a huge fan of love and a romantic. You can say I am a love nerd. Oh and another thing you should know is that I am single.

Being single is an identifier in my life’s current stage. It is also my blessing and my struggle. It is my freedom and my curse. Singleness has caused me to cry and caused me to dance with joy. Yeah, it’s a bit of an oxymoron, but both sides are true.

Being single has even taught me a lesson or two. It has showed me who I am and given me confidence in being the person I am made to be.

I am grateful that this is the struggle I’ve been given and the life issue that is closest to my life. My health, job situation, or family relations could be a lot worst. I could have actual real struggles, but I don’t.

Of course sometimes not having a partner feels like the end of the world and worst thing possible. During those dark moments I imagine bargaining away my health, a limb, or one of my senses, just to have a partner in life.

If you have been single for any major length of time you know the yearning for a partner comes in waves. Like any emotional thing in life relationships or lack there of are emotional roller coasters. As for right now I’m at the part of the roller coaster where I am at peace with the pain of being alone. It’s not that I’m numb to the loneliness. I’m just use to it.

My Singleness

I have been single for 10 years now. I have only kissed 1 guy in those 10 years and that was about 8 years ago. You can trust me when I say I know the single life.

I am truly chronically single. That does not mean I do not love or that I have not learned lessons about love. It is at the center of everything that is important to me. I just haven’t personally experienced romantic love in a very long time.

I also love learning about love and sharing my thoughts on love.

What are the different definitions of love? What comes first the action of love or the feelings of love? What does it truly mean to love?

I hope to answer these questions and more in this series. I also will share my journey to accepting my life stage with you and how I became a love nerd.

Want to learn or read more?

This blog series stems from my book “To Love” which I until February 13,2020 I have a kickstarter for. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.

Tiff’s Tips

by tiffanyTiff's Tips January 7, 2020January 3, 2020No Comments

We all know things other do not. It’s a fact of living. You’re not going to have the same knowledge base or experiences as someone else. No matter where you are on your journey you can help other people. I have been on my creative journey for a few years now and I have been learning things every step of the way. That is why I’m sharing things I know with this blog series, Tiff’s Tips.

My experiences and my life have taught me things that you may not know. What I have to say may help someone just by the facts I share, or who I am may explain it in a different way, with a different light that makes the tip click into their mind.

Yes, some of these things may seem common place or obvious to you, but others may not realize or know those tips.

I hope you enjoy this series and I hope you learn from it. Please allow it to help your mind grow and your thinking to shift, so that you can achieve your goals. Hopefully by the end you will see your art and goals in a new light.

I will leave you now with the first ten tips of this series. In the coming months I will explain and expand on each of them.

Define Success for yourself
Decide If You Are A Hobbyist or Artist
Have an Ideal Life
Start where you are
Assess and Have Goals
Do Not Give Up
Have Creative Friends
Try Different Things
Do Not Be Afraid To Change
Regularly Reflect On Your Journey

Side note: I did do a video project about goals years ago. Check out the playlist if you’re interested.

Ending note

This is part of Tiff’s Tips a blog series. I have also done a goal setting video series on YouTube.

My Writing Life (Journey To Me)

by tiffanyJourney To Me, Life, Real Life April 17, 2018April 24, 2020No Comments

I usually start the story of my creative life with dance class and then go into my experiences with musical theater. It’s easy for me to gloss over my early writing experience.

There are three reasons I do this. The first reason is that although my grammar and spelling were not great creative writing came naturally to me. I don’t remember any lessons about how to write poetry or short stories in elementary school or early middle school. However, I do remember writing a story when I was 10 about a 10-year-old girl.

The second reason for never focusing on my early writing life is because I never felt it was important. It was always just something I did. I hardly ever shared my stories with people. Since I didn’t share my writing I never celebrated that part of my creativity. The theater was what I celebrated and did so publicly. The writing I did was a private thing.

The third reason is my confidence in my writing was low. Sure I wrote creative things constantly, but I was never amazing in English or spelling classes. I was an average student when it came to writing assignments. Grammar and spelling are not my strong suit. I still struggle with spelling certain words, and will reread sentences to make sure they are correct. Why would I talk or share something I wasn’t good at?

The thing is whether I’m good at it or not writing is a big important part of me. It is like talking to me; I may mispronounce words or not be as eloquent as others in my speech, but it is how I communicate. It is on aspect that makes me who I am.

There is increasingly more comfortable with that aspect of me. I am a writer and will describe myself as such.

I have come along way in my writing life and now I love sharing my writing. It may not be the best, but my writing is truthfully me. I would not have it any other way.

Want More?

II have more stories that show how I became who I am. They are in the Journey to Me series. I also have stories specifically about God and of course, I wrote a book about my views and experiences with Love called To Love.