Story Time
If you read my book To Love, you know I’ve tried online dating. I tried 3 times and technically I am still on a site. I have had little luck with online dating, but I have gotten a couple stories from it.
My favorite story is one that took place during my second round of online dating. I started talking with a guy that lived on the other side of the country. It would be a long-distance relationship, but I didn’t want that to stop me. We both figured we should try to see if a long-distance thing would work.
We talked via texts for about a week, then had a video date. Because of work issues, the video date almost didn’t happen. When the date happened, I already had my pajamas on with messy hair. He was already relaxing in his bed in his pajamas, which did not include a shirt.
We chatted for a little, but he had to get off to help a friend who was texting him. After the call, I texted him to tell him I was getting ready for bed and I would talk to him the next day. He responded with saying he didn’t think we should continue the long-distance thing.
I asked “why.” He acted like it would offend me. My goal was to learn if it was something I should change. I wanted any feedback I could get too, since I don’t date too much. After a bit of prying, he told me his shallow reason.
His reason to stop talking, “neck fat.”
I immediately realized that was all on him. It didn’t offend me and I almost found his reason funny. He acted like he could break my heart. He told me he was aware of his shallowness and that he tried to get over his issues. It seemed like an actual struggle for him.
I suggested working through this struggle with God in prayer and meditation to which he responded with he had, but it’s just how God made him.
I stopped the conversation after that. If you act like something is an issue and want to change it, you can’t also say it’s just who you are. If you don’t like what you see in yourself or who you are, you do possess the power to change.
I love telling the story. I find the specificness with his shallowness funny. He did not care that I was not a twig or that I have a rounder body than he would prefer. It was specifically my neck fat.
I guess I shouldn’t have the phone like this.
Want More?
This blog series stems from my book “To Love,” which has a whole YouTube Playlist devoted to it. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.