I've been in battle with the word all my life. The hard distant pews were too hard of seats for me. It meant too much then too little. I saw the rules as chains so it's funny that when my soul breathed church is where those chains were broken and I was truly set free.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio. You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
I’ll wait is a poem I wrote in 2014 and a throwback video. It performed well on my site, so I did a poetry reading recording of it for YouTube. It then did pretty well on YouTube and is one of my throwback posts.
My throwback posts are my attempt to highlight some of my older work to display my growth, while making sure the work is properly promoted.
I will wait for inspiration to come for thoughts like a word bubble to appear above my head. I will wait until my mind is ready and my brain turns on like a computer boting up. I will wait until my body tells me it is time to write and then when patience is no longer needed and inspiration comes I will write. I will write watever my mind tells me to write. My mind whispers to my fingers and what is scribbled in the thought bubble above my head. When I know what to write I will ready my body unleash my mind and write but until then I will wait.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio. You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
I remind myself Breathe. Close your eyes if you must but breathe. One, Two, Three. Inhale the exhale. Your heart doesn't need to beat so loud. Breathe. There is no real danger, nothing to truly fear, so breathe. Breathe in with the peace that surrounds you out with the anxiety that built. Breathe in with the love we share out with the bottled up fear. Breathe sometimes I need to remind myself to breathe.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio. You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
You can learn a lot from every chapter of life if you keep an open mind and look for learning opportunities. There are lessons you can learn from a single’s life. There are always lessons. Once you’re comfortable being single, you’ll be able to learn a lot. Among the things I’ve learned while being single, there are two important lessons that stick out in my mind.
The first lesson is that doing things alone is okay. You won’t spontaneously combust if you go to a restaurant alone. The sky won’t fall if you go to the movies alone. It is a valid choice to be out in public doing things you want to do with no one else. You can go to the beach without other people or go on hikes with just yourself. The more you are alone, the more you’ll realize how nice it is.
The second lesson is that it is important to take care of yourself. When you are single, you don’t have another person to go on dates with or to pamper you. There isn’t someone making you feel special or talking to you about your issues. The wonderful news is that you can and should do that all by yourself. You can pamper yourself and do most normal date night ideas alone. Self care is important in any chapter of your life. When you are single, it is easier to find time to make self care a part of your life and routine. You can build habits of self care and see that you can do nice things for yourself.
It is liberating to become self-sufficient. It frees you from a lot of things you may assume you need to do or think you can’t do, because you are single. There are no rules against going out by yourself or taking care of yourself how you see fit. If you do, you may even find you are marvelous company.
This blog series stems from my book “To Love,” which has a whole YouTube Playlist devoted to it. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.
God, where are you when the world seems dark? Lord, where are you when I've lost my way? Savior, where are you when I feel alone? My King, where are you when your throne seems far away? Father Above, where are you when my heart breaks and turns numb? Father Above, My King, Savior, Lord, and God where are you in this day? God, you are the light of a new day. Lord, you are the dim lamp that lights my way. Savior, you are the one holding me up. My King, you are by my side. Father Above, you are hugging me tight. Father Above, My King, Savior, Lord, and God you are with me making day from my night.
Typically, I publish my poetry towards the end of the month not in the middle of it. However, I really loved how Where Are You came out and couldn’t wait to share this poem with the world.
Sometimes you can’t see God and feel alone. However, He is always there. Most of the time you just have to look for Him. Know He loves you and He is with you.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio. You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
Don't agree with me
when you know we can't be.
Don't stand too close
when my religion feels lost.
Don't buy my heart
when you know one day we will part.
For cuddling seems to near
and that is one thing I fear.
Having the possibility
of home among your arms,
not wanting to release you from my own.
I forget my reasoning,
the excuses are dispearing.
I am alone with the thought
that my heart you may have already bought,
with your laughter and joy
with your friendship and smile
with your intelligence and being loyal
and that would mean all my plans are foiled.
Because the list of how you bought my heart,
well, that could go on for miles.
Don't agree with me
when you know we can't be
So don't buy my heart
when you know one day we will part.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio . You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
If you read my book To Love, you know I’ve tried online dating. I tried 3 times and technically I am still on a site. I have had little luck with online dating, but I have gotten a couple stories from it.
My favorite story is one that took place during my second round of online dating. I started talking with a guy that lived on the other side of the country. It would be a long-distance relationship, but I didn’t want that to stop me. We both figured we should try to see if a long-distance thing would work.
We talked via texts for about a week, then had a video date. Because of work issues, the video date almost didn’t happen. When the date happened, I already had my pajamas on with messy hair. He was already relaxing in his bed in his pajamas, which did not include a shirt.
We chatted for a little, but he had to get off to help a friend who was texting him. After the call, I texted him to tell him I was getting ready for bed and I would talk to him the next day. He responded with saying he didn’t think we should continue the long-distance thing.
I asked “why.” He acted like it would offend me. My goal was to learn if it was something I should change. I wanted any feedback I could get too, since I don’t date too much. After a bit of prying, he told me his shallow reason.
His reason to stop talking, “neck fat.”
I immediately realized that was all on him. It didn’t offend me and I almost found his reason funny. He acted like he could break my heart. He told me he was aware of his shallowness and that he tried to get over his issues. It seemed like an actual struggle for him.
I suggested working through this struggle with God in prayer and meditation to which he responded with he had, but it’s just how God made him.
I stopped the conversation after that. If you act like something is an issue and want to change it, you can’t also say it’s just who you are. If you don’t like what you see in yourself or who you are, you do possess the power to change.
I love telling the story. I find the specificness with his shallowness funny. He did not care that I was not a twig or that I have a rounder body than he would prefer. It was specifically my neck fat.
I guess I shouldn’t have the phone like this.
This blog series stems from my book “To Love,” which has a whole YouTube Playlist devoted to it. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.
Do not look for me
in the ashes of who I once was.
I will not be found there.
I am in the memories you hold dear
and the jokes we once shared.
I am in the love you have
and the breeze that moves among the trees.
So, do not look for me
in the ashes of who I once was.
Sometimes I write poetry for fun or to uplift others. Sometimes I write poems to explain something that is going on internally. Most poems that I share are positive or ends with hope. Look For Me is a different kind of poem.
I wrote Look For Me in August 2019, while I was in Massachusetts helping my family prepare for my brother’s memorial service. It may not be happy, but I do hope it comforts you if you are grieving.
If you would like to read more of my poetry please take a look at my portfolio. You can also watch a few of my poetry readings.
In the “Chronically Single” post, I mentioned that being single can be a blessing. There are both joys and a downside to singleness.
Instead of being overly wordy I figured I’d list them out for you.
These are my own lists. If you are single, whether chronically or just temporarily single, I am sure your list is a bit different. I would love to hear what are the joys and downside of being single are for you. Let be know below or on one of my social media accounts (tiffyjoyberry).
This blog series stems from my book “To Love,” which has a whole YouTube Playlist devoted to it. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.
What do I mean by chronically single and what is it like?
I define being chronically single as not going on a romantic date for over 5 years. This means you haven’t been in a romantic relationship or have had a romantic possibility for 5 years.
The short answer of what it is like is that it sucks and it is a blessing.
After you accept being single as the stage of life you’re in you can do a lot of things you didn’t realize you could do.
Going to dinner and a movie by yourself is a treat and becomes less awkward. Simply becoming more independent is a huge blessing that makes me feel free.
After awhile I realized I became happier and happier for my friends who find love. It turned from ‘why not me’ to ‘yay them.’ Happiness and love is not a competition it’s a celebration.
I am also able to see non-romantic love more and cheerish my friends and family more now that I stopped obsessing over my romantic life or lack there of.
Yes, I do still yearn for a romantic partner and someone to share my life with in a special way. However, it’s not the right timing yet.
I do pray for my future husband, whoever he may be. I am trying to keep my heart open to finding him. It’s not my whole life and I’m okay in the stage of life I’m in.
I’m learning a lot from being chronically single and loving what I’m learning, even if it is tough at times.
This blog series stems from my book “To Love,” which has a whole YouTube Playlist devoted to it. I will also be posting more in this series on the Love Nerd page of this site.