Sometimes I feel like I should have already started a more creative life. I want to be further along in my creative career. This makes me feel like my life is passing me by. I forget to look at all the great stories I now have to pull from. I ignore the fact that each year, month, week, and day have shaped me into the unique artist that I am.
It frustrates me to see where I want to go and not be there. It is also frustrating not having a clear path laid out before me. If feels like I’m in Californian traffic during rush hour and I’m not even sure if my gps/ plan is actually correct. Perhaps there is a better path for me, or at least better steps that I can be taking.
If you want to be a doctor there is a clear plan. You go to college, then med school. Then I believe there is an internship or residence. After that you are a full on doctor. You apply to jobs, go on interviews and get a job.
If you want to be a lawyer, you go to law school, take the bar exam, and apply to jobs. Then you are a lawyer.
Being a professional artist is a bit different. You can go to school, but you don’t have to. Some people apply to jobs or get freelance jobs, but other do not go that route. Some will work on finding commission jobs, others will not take commissions.
You basically do what fits you and your art the best, but it takes time to figure that out. Of course, more and more I believe a lot of life is just like that. You need to figure out what works best for you and your life.
Sometimes it’s learning from others that will help you down your path in life. Other times it’s trial and errors.
I think as long as you are moving towards your life goals, no matter how slow or sloppily, you are still going down your path and that is a good thing. This is one thing I need to remind myself when I think I’m going to slow or not seeing enough progress.
I really want you to know my art is my soul. If I give you a painting I’m giving you a piece of solid love. A story created for you is my heart forming words solely for you. A sculpture, a gift, a puppet, or jewelry are 3D versions of pieces of my soul given to the ones I love.
So if you give me your art I see your heart, or love, or soul intertwined in it. I see your love in art, and I am truly grateful that you trust me with it.
Art means a lot to me. I believe just like love, art should be spread around and given out. We should cherish it not only for its physical beauty, but what is behind it.
Now that I have spent most of my day off from work being distracted by the internet and random stuff I think I can sit down and write about my week. I just have to remember what I did this week and what made it a journey towards my dreams.
I did write more than normal and Sunday I spent the day reading about God. Besides that I don’t think anything that interesting happened in my life this week.
I have read more about God and am trying to figure out what would be the best path for me. That seems to be the most important thing in my life now. It is good that I actually ordered my goals right this time. This goal is my number one goal both on paper and actions.
I feel my relationships growing, although I am pretty sure I didn’t say I love you everyday. I still am focusing in on the important relationships in my life and I hope the people in my life can tell.
I have worked on my book for 3 hours since making the 30 hours in 30 days goal. It’s not as far as I feel like I should be, but it is something. In those 3 hours I have also gotten farther than I thought I would.
I just rearranged my last two goals, because I am realizing that my acting and writing career/ passion trumps my physical goals. I do have a plan or experiment to boost my health and fitness, but acting and writing take up a bigger aspect of my thought life. Especially, lately I have been thinking of projects that would help me boost my audience base, income, or both.
One thing that I am working on is getting my visual art or sell-able stuff up on eBay. I also want to make more masks and post those on eBay, also. However, the masks will be after I get my paintings up on eBay. This is mostly because I already have paintings I can sell, while I only actually own one of my masks and it is not for sale.
I guess that’s all I have to say today about my journey. I’m simply taking small steps and coming up with ideas at this point. One day I will be able to run towards my dreams and take giant leaps of faith, but today I am only able to put one foot in front of the other.
The steps I took towards my dreams are as follows:
A Whispered Promise
A Pondering Poem
In This Moment
Weekly Writing Prompts
Can art go on art;
Laying on it like a lover?
One inspiring the other,
but no romance to handle?
Would the art be part of the other art;
like one piece of the whole is the heart?
It would supply life,
living as section,
being whole by being only a part.
This is just a fast little poem, but I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think.
A week or two (maybe three), you may have noticed a change to my blog. I changed the theme and added a logo/ painting to the topof the site. This same painting is on my YouTube channel, twitter profile, and Facebook page as backgrounds.
This painting was a fun one to do, because the only rule I gave myself was that it had to represent me in some way. I used my favorite color combination, which is blue and yellow. I tried to add in something other ones, but it the end it was blue and yellow that lasted. I also made sure to throw in some wave looking things at the end, since I love the water so much.
I recorded myself painting this video and sped it up. Then I added The Beetle’s song From Me To You. So take a minute or two to watch this painting that is a little part of myself that I give to you.
Thank you for reading, watching and generally supporting me. Please let me know what you think.
There is a little cafe near my house that I believe I am becoming a regular at. Today I went by myself and had breakfast. I decided to write a little as I waited. This is one of the poems I wrote while enjoying their food. It really is a great place.
With painted wall,
warm and inviting
art hangs welcoming guest
saying be who you are
do what you will
and enjoy the good that is served
With the sky on the ceiling
bright and pleasing
curtains hang to welcome guest
saying come near or far
do what you will
and enjoy the food that is served
So I write and dream
sitting in the corner so I can watch
the couples eat
The students study
and an other lone female reading the paper
I sit, watch and writing
doing what I will
and enjoying the food that is served.
You may have noticed that this past weekend I spent a lot of time with my camera recording. I had my normal acting video, my painting, and a special short story for my nephew.
My hope in doing acting videos is for people to watch, be entertained, and hopefully give feedback. I am doing them so I can grow. My focus with them is others that I may not know. I’m trying to reach the widest audience with these videos.
I recorded my painting because I find it interesting to watch a painting come to life. I know a few friends enjoy watching them, but I do it because I like it. I’m not really focused on the audience with these videos.
Finally I recorded my short story for an audience of one. I only cared about entertaining my nephew. I had fun writing for him and showing my love to him in a unique way; in a way that was very much me. He has been a big fan of mine and he may not even know how much him liking my art means to me, but it means the world to me. I can always count on him for a good review.
What is interesting about these three videos? Well I realized something important. It is something that I should have known and as an artist I should remind myself every time before sitting/ standing to create. I realized that when you focus your art on someone you love or share your love through your art, that is when it means something. When love is at the center you will get noticed.
I almost didn’t post my short story on youtube. I was just going to post it on my sister’s facebook wall, but I wanted to make sure my nephew would be able to see it whenever he wanted. That was the only reason I posted it on youtube. Now it has 11 views, (I know that is not that much) when I was hoping for only 1. My painting has 14, when I did not care and my acting has 3 when I was going for at least 14.
The lesson in all of this is remembered to do what you love because you love it, not because of others.
I normally do not like posting twice in one day, but I just finished an abstract painting that is very different from the other post so thought I would share it with you.
I started this painting with it vaguely in my mind, but I was not sure how it would come out. I never tried to paint a heart on fire before. I do like how it came out. The purpose of this painting is to display the passion that is in at least my heart that shines even when the surroundings are dark.
The video is the recording of me painting it and the pictures are of the finish product (in case you could not tell).
A short narrative poem with stanzas of two or four lines and usually a refrain. The story of a ballad can originate from a wide range of subject matter but most frequently deals with folk-lore or popular legends. They are written in straight-forward verse, seldom with detail, but always with graphic simplicity and force. Most ballads are suitable for singing and, while sometimes varied in practice, are generally written in ballad meter, i.e., alternating lines of iambic tetrameter and iambic trimeter, with the last words of the second and fourth lines rhyming.
She sat and wondered
looking up at the stars
resting her weary mind
far from the sound of cars
The wind whispered her name
and brought magic to the night
the stars twinkled into shapes
and the stars seemed to burn bright
She sat and wondered
looking up at the stars
resting her weary mind
far from the sound of cars
In this night she was with friends
this night that seemed like a metaphor
She watched it dance by
and wondered if it was actually a lore
She was detached from the night
lost in her mind
Where the stars burn bright
and the heavens unwind.
To continue my write every form of poetry challenge I will be doing an Acrostic.
Acrostic Poetry is where the first letter of each line spells a word, usually using the same words as in the title.
Celebrate with me
Happiness is raining down
Ecstasy will befall you when you
Eat this wonderful masterpiece
Soon happiness will be known
Everyone will hopefully eat this wonderful cheese.
This quick poem brought to you by a quote I found. “Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.” – G. K. Chesterton. I hope you enjoyed my cheesy poem on cheese.