DreamWard Bound- Flying

Note: There was a delay in publishing this blog.

As I write I’m 34,005 ft high. I’m flying back to California and anxiety is rising. I feel uncomfortable energy pulsing through my body into my mind. It touches my heart. There is a need to get up, to move, to do something besides sitting still.

My life is returning to me after being on vacation and cementing the process of leaping off a metaphoric cliff that I’ve been staring at for years.

I’m leaving my well paying job with good benefits to pursue my dreams. This is a big step on the path towards my dreams and it feels very real and giant.

This leap of faith I’m facing does not seem logical to me at this moment, but I know it is right. I know I need to leave the office job and start living the life I actually am suppose to live.

The unknown still frightens  me.

It is an excited time in my life and I am happy that I am dreamward bound, even if there is fearful energy trying to take control. I won’t let it though, too many great opportunities lay ahead of me. I just have to remember to breathe and remind myself that I’m worth following my dreams.

More DreamWard Bound Means More Work

success

I was going to go to BJJ training today. I started to wake up early enough. I actually thought I didn’t turn on my alarm, because it seemed later than it was. I wanted to go, too. I need to get back into a routine with training. It would have been really great to move my body and feel great about myself. However, Saturdays are my only day I get sleep in and relax in the morning. I also realized I have a full 8 hour day of editing, writing, and producing, well setting up the first things for my production company.

This work is good. I am actually taking major steps towards my dreams. I can see things coming together. Really, it is the beginning of things coming together. I am still far away from every real dream I have. And, it is also a lot of work to get to my dreams. I just have to keep reminding myself that it will be worth it. 8 hrs of work on Saturdays, weeknight work sessions, commuting to my day job, and working 8 hrs at my day job will be worth living my dreams.

I also have made a decision to start researching different hosting platforms and ad services. This way I can actually make profit with this site in hopes that I can partly support myself with this site. I am also looking into creating an online store on this site, so that you can buy my artwork easily. Basically, I am looking for different income revenues in order that I can free up my time to do more creative things. Freedom seems a long way away. Still, success is made up of little steps in the right direction.

Yes, I have a lot of work ahead of me and I am procrastinating by looking around the internet. I mean, I have looked for YouTube videos about the top hosting companies and microphones for better sound quality in my videos. I have also been looking at my Facebook and Twitter to see if there is any new interactions and talking with an actor friend. It’s not like I went around looking at cat pictures or goofy videos. Still, I do need to get to work on editing, writing, and producing.

I’m going to go do that now. Here is some other stuff that I did this week.

Pain (a Poem)

Let Me Live (A Poem)

I Am A Hurt Bagel

Writing Prompts

An Early DreamWard Bound

success

Now that I have spent most of my day off from work being distracted by the internet and random stuff I think I can sit down and write about my week. I just have to remember what I did this week and what made it a journey towards my dreams.

I did write more than normal and Sunday I spent the day reading about God. Besides that I don’t think anything that interesting happened in my life this week.

I have read more about God and am trying to figure out what would be the best path for me. That seems to be the most important thing in my life now. It is good that I actually ordered my goals right this time. This goal is my number one goal both on paper and actions.

I feel my relationships growing, although I am pretty sure I didn’t say I love you everyday. I still am focusing in on the important relationships in my life and I hope the people in my life can tell.

I have worked on my book for 3 hours since making the 30 hours in 30 days goal. It’s not as far as I feel like I should be, but it is something. In those 3 hours I have also gotten farther than I thought I would.

I just rearranged my last two goals, because I am realizing that my acting and writing career/ passion trumps my physical goals. I do have a plan or experiment to boost my health and fitness, but acting and writing take up a bigger aspect of my thought life. Especially, lately I have been thinking of projects that would help me boost my audience base, income, or both.

One thing that I am working on is getting my visual art or sell-able stuff up on eBay. I also want to make more masks and post those on eBay, also. However, the masks will be after I get my paintings up on eBay. This is mostly because I already have paintings I can sell, while I only actually own one of my masks and it is not for sale.

I guess that’s all I have to say today about my journey. I’m simply taking small steps and coming up with ideas at this point. One day I will be able to run towards my dreams and take giant leaps of faith, but today I am only able to put one foot in front of the other.

The steps I took towards my dreams are as follows:

A Whispered Promise

A Pondering Poem

In This Moment

Dark Den

Weekly Writing Prompts