My Path (Journey To Me)

Sometimes I feel like I should have already started a more creative life. I want to be further along in my creative career. This makes me feel like my life is passing me by. I forget to look at all the great stories I now have to pull from. I ignore the fact that each year, month, week, and day have shaped me into the unique artist that I am.

It frustrates me to see where I want to go and not be there. It is also frustrating not having a clear path laid out before me. If feels like I’m in Californian traffic during rush hour and I’m not even sure if my gps/ plan is actually correct. Perhaps there is a better path for me, or at least better steps that I can be taking.

If you want to be a doctor there is a clear plan. You go to college, then med school. Then I believe there is an internship or residence. After that you are a full on doctor. You apply to jobs, go on interviews and get a job.

If you want to be a lawyer, you go to law school, take the bar exam, and apply to jobs. Then you are a lawyer.

Being a professional artist is a bit different. You can go to school, but you don’t have to. Some people apply to jobs or get freelance jobs, but other do not go that route. Some will work on finding commission jobs, others will not take commissions.

You basically do what fits you and your art the best, but it takes time to figure that out. Of course, more and more I believe a lot of life is just like that. You need to figure out what works best for you and your life.

Sometimes it’s learning from others that will help you down your path in life. Other times it’s trial and errors.

I think as long as you are moving towards your life goals, no matter how slow or sloppily, you are still going down your path and that is a good thing. This is one thing I need to remind myself when I think I’m going to slow or not seeing enough progress.

A DreamWard Bound Post From Far, Far Away

success

Okay, maybe I’m not far, far away. I may feel like I am, but I am actually home. The feeling of being in a different galaxy comes from watching all the Star Wars movies (except for episode 1) yesterday. It was a great experience. I now can say I’ve seen all the Star Wars movies(except for episode 1). I really enjoyed the movies. The only issue is that I have been watching 4 hours or less of television weekly. I only watch television with my friends now and maybe a couple of YouTube videos. By the last movies I had a hard time finishing. I was entering a movie overload. I did finish and finished without my eyes bleeding or my brain exploding.

The marathon of awesomeness is why I did not post this week’s DreamWard Bound yesterday. I woke up, went to my friends’ house, watch Star Wars, came home, and went to bed. That was my day yesterday. It was crazy for me that I did nothing on my Saturday, which is typically my blog/ artistic work day. I am thankful, that I have tomorrow off of work. I will be able to edit and write. I might even find time to do a video.

I did do some things to move forward in my journey to my dreams. I am sure I did do some stuff.

Let’s see I published some posts, all of which were still from my vacation. Also, I did some research into film companies or groups around me. It was not really successful research, since I am stuck between “beggars can’t be choosers” and “I don’t want my name associated with that type of video.” Basically the level of quality is not great, but I need to start somewhere.

I will be doing more searches and looking for other productions that I hopefully can audition for. That will be an ongoing thing. I am pretty sure I will always be looking for auditions and new productions, since that is the way of an actor.

I am also, publishing/ moving over my Goal Getter’s series to my channel. So far, I have published the introduction and the first 3 steps. More will be published this week.

Here is the list of other things I published this week.

To Sleep

Stories (A poem)

Writing with colors

My Ring

Weekly Writing Prompt

The Not So Much DreamWard Bound Week.

success

 

This week was a tough week for my productivity. My mom was here until Tuesday and we did a lot of sight-seeing and tourist stuff. It was fun and I love having that time with my mom.

The only thing, was that it wore me out and knocked me off my schedule. For the rest of this week I’ve tried to recharge and get motivated. With my energy levels and people levels (wanting/ lack of wanting or needing to socialize/ be around people) all messed up it was hard to much of anything.

I started writing a few times only to either not be able to finish or to be disappointed with what I wrote.

Thankfully, I went to bed early last night and went to Jiu-Jitsu this morning. I’m not 100% back and motivated to do everything I should want to do, but I am writing this post and have ideas about what to write next.

Also, I feel like I can’t be too hard on myself, since I did recently have a real good week when I wrote, Artist: a monologue. I also published a video of me performing it.

One thing I am excited about that should be starting this week is that I am going to be switching my Goal Getters’ videos over to my main YouTube channel. I will be recording a fast alert video, hopefully today for that channel then publishing the steps and tips videos on my main channel later this week. This way I can have all the statics in one place from here on out. Also, I have a few more subscribers on my main channel, so the videos will theoretically get watched a little more.

With that I will leave you with excitement to see what I do in the following weeks. If you are not excited for more things to come at least you can see what I have done. Here is the list.

Writing Prompt

Okay, so it is not much of a list. Next week’s should be longer.

DreamWard Bound Or The Week My Mom Visited

success

This week was all focused on my mom’s first California trip. I did get to post three posts in the beginning of the week. One of them, my week’s monologue, did surprisingly well. I was also able to post a video this week.

My mom came on Wednesday, so after that my time was focused on her and not my goals. I took her every where that I could. We are now both tired and ready for a beach day, which will be tomorrow. This will hopefully give me time to write for the coming week. I do have the start of a poem, but I am not sure how I am feeling about it.

I’m trying to think of other things to say or write. I am really trying, but I believe they will just have to come out in story or poetry form. Perhaps after a beach day my mind will be able to focus on thoughts and ideas. Until then I will leave you with a list of things I published this week.

Game (A Poem)

Artist (A monologue)

Weekly Writing Prompt

Slowly Walking DreamWard Bound

success

I seem to be taking steps towards my dreams and end goals. They are just small steps. I started to budget, so that I can save money to further my journey. With budgeting being done with my money I can see how far I have to go with being able to afford what I need to do. An example of what I am talking about is, I am trying to save money to afford an acting coach. I know I need an outsider’s eye to point me to what I need to do. I also want to make sure I actually have art supplies in my budget and that I will be able to give away at least a few books (once I finish it).

With working on my money budget I am realizing I need to do that with my time. I have a limited amount of time during a month, just like I have a limited amount of money. I need to make sure I am using my time wisely, even more than my money I feel like. I noticed a lot this week that although I am not watching television for three months I am still distracting myself and not being productive. Yes, I do need breaks and to relax, but switching from wasting my time on one thing to another does not help anything.

My goals are important to me and time is more important in completing them than money. I am looking up time management apps to help me, well manage my time. Hopefully, distractions will be cut down when I realize how little time I really have.

I am working on my goals. The hardest 2 this week seems to be my physical goal  (basically eating healthier and exercising more), and editing ( 30 hours in 30 days). I just can’t seem to find time to exercise, edit or make healthy meals. I am eating healthier and going to BJJ, but I’m not stretching myself.

Still, I can see where I am doing well. I am reading the Bible more, getting more sleep (thanks to no t.v.), saying ‘I love you,’ more, having more conversation, and looking towards my future in acting and writing. I am doing things, but I can always see room to improve.

I always am looking on ways to improve and usually hard on myself, but that’s just who I am.

I will end this post on a good note. I was able to write 3 things this week. Here they are.

Who For?

Can I Meet Fantasy?

Weekly Writing Prompt

DreamWard Bound like always.

success

I actually am not always dreamward bound. Some days I don’t even think about my goals. However, I feel most like myself when I am. If I have a goal, a plan and a schedule I am happiest. That is why I am happily writing this post.

I at least feel like this week went real well. I revised my goals early in the week and revised my schedule last weekend. I didn’t make every goal and did change one midweek. Still I worked towards my goals.

I should tell you what my new goals are now, before I tell you how I did with them. It might make sense to you if I told you the aim before telling you how close or far I came to the target.

My first goal is to finish my second draft of my novel by May 3rd. This has been my goal for almost a year now. I just kept saying it was a priority but not really acting like it was. I kept writing blog posts and poems. I did not actually give most of my time to it. Now I will. I have my schedule worked out, so that I am editing more. I am also going to take most of next weekend, if not all of it, and dedicate it to getting the novel done. I may even rent a hotel room in order for fewer distractions.

My next goal is the one that I actually revise twice this week. First I was going to try to read the Bible within a year again. The trouble I found with that was that I actually did not pick up the Bible. It was too scary and big of a challenge. I decided it was best to change it. I wanted to focus on God, but actually focus on learning and not just reading. If I stuck with reading the Bible within a year I would not be focusing on learning about God. I would only focus on reading and reading fast enough. It would be come a chore like it had in the past and not  a joy and learning experience. So, I changed my goal to taking 10 minutes a day to learn about God. I will either pray for 10 minutes or listen to some audiobook, podcast or sermon. I may also read a book or a chapter in the Bible. This gives me more options and is not as big as a project.  After a month I will increase the amount of time I spend learning about God.

After that the next important goal is my weight/ health goal. I want to lose 30lbs by the start of next year. The main reason I want to lose this weight is to make jiu-jitsu easier and if I do compete I won’t be in the heavyweight division if I lose the 30lbs. Honestly, though I am not sure if I will end up losing 30 pounds. I want muscle and having muscle is more important to me than weighing less, so if I lose a bunch of weight and realize that I am losing muscle I’ll stop. Right now though, I want to lose 30lbs.

This goal is followed by my creative writing goal. I  want to get back up to writing 5 creative posts a week. This will include my weekly writing prompt, but I will also try to actually use the writing prompts to write more posts. That was the idea for the weekly writing prompts to start with. It was going to be inspiration for the next posts. I got busy though and my schedule was just not allowing for me to write. I want to start writing more, again. That is why my goal will be to get up to 5 posts a week, well 6 if you count my DreamWard bound posts.

Finally my last goal is to read a book a month and I mean really read. I am not going to count audio books as reading. At least I won’t count them at this time. Maybe in the future my ideas will change, but for now I want to actually read a book a month. I mean I have a years worth of real hard copies of books and even more e-books. The main focus for this goal though is to expand my knowledge base, get inspiration and learn about different author’s voices.

I think these goals will be a good mix of challenging and fun to do. I am looking forward to accomplishing them and letting you know how I am doing with them every week.

A Quarter Of The Way To 100

ocean walk 192

A while back I gave myself a challenge and it was a few days, maybe a week or so before I actually accepted the challenge but I did. I mentioned in the post where I shared the challenge that I was going to be keeping a log about the journey this challenge would be. I wasn’t sure at the time how I was going to do it. I just knew that I wanted to be able to share real thoughts that I had through this process. This was to both share with people about my journey and goal achieving, but also to help me. I wanted to motivate myself to keep on doing this challenge.

I decided when I started to actually do the short work out that I would keep track on a piece of paper tapped to my bathroom mirror. I also tapped a page above that and with each tally mark I wrote one line. Some days I squeezed in as much as I could others I just wrote 3 large words. I want to share that log with you now.

  1. It does not matter when you start, just that you start.
  2. Starting is the hardest and scariest part of the journey but needed. (I also wrote see twitter for 2.2.15, which says, “One day I will be able to submit someone in a fight, today is not that day, but it was a learning day closer”)
  3. Change, goals, and dreams don’t happen overnight, work towards them day after day.
  4. Convincing yourself you’re worth the work is work but worth it.
  5. Little by little and step by step is what it takes to see massive changes.
  6. By pushing yourself to do something you don’t think you can do you may find out you can.
  7. Fighting for tomorrow mean giving up you’re today. Also there is 2 parts of you the cannot and the can learn how to make the can side win. (That was after a 2 am workout, because I stayed out late with my friends)
  8. If you know how you learn, you will learn more. (This was a class day.)
  9. Working for what you want will pay off if you are constant.
  10. You know you’ve found your thing when the pain is worth it. (This was followed by a side note of  “yay, chokes. :-)”)
  11. Sometimes you just need to take way the options, make your step towards success mandatory.
  12. Starting is the worst, it’s hard and sucks, but shows you what you can do. Stick with it. You got this.
  13. I may be tired; I may not be clever, but I am doing what I set out to do.
  14. Your goals should be fun, educational and worth the pain. (This was another class day.)
  15. Making a goal a need makes it easier to do, even if it’s by force.
  16. Friends should make the goals easier. (This should be a class day note.)
  17. It’s getting easier.
  18. You know you’re doing something different and hard when you start to question seeming random choices in your life.
  19. I guess some days you just do and not learn.Doing is valuable too
  20. Some days you just have to make time. It’s worth it.
  21. Pushing yourself forward is just walking on a path or journey towards your goals. (This was a class day, also.)
  22. You can do anything as long as you work for it.
  23. People will notice your efforts. Keep on to show yourself your efforts. (This was a class day, I  know because people are starting to see my efforts in class. I don’t yet see my improvements, though. I still feel like a newbie who knows nothing.)
  24. Strength is worked at not given.
  25. You can still work even if you are tired. It will be more of an accomplishment.
  26. Sometimes realizing it’s the last part of the day makes the rest worth it.

You can see some days I was stereotypical in my motivation, other days it was more aimed towards keeping track of my main thought. I hope you enjoyed it and let me know what you think.

Realization

success

I’m realizing I want to be an actor, but I cannot not be an author. I will write even if no one reads. I will create stories even if a pen and paper are not near. Characters come into my mind and I see stories without trying. The only real hard part with writing is getting everything written so that others can understand the things I find beautiful.

That is why this year I will be focusing on my writing. I will still try to post videos, but acting and media will be on the C/ last tier of goals. Writing either this blogs or my novel will be A/ first tier and the most important goals this year.

I want to get this draft done and polish my novel up to get editors or friends to give me their input. Plus, the deadline for this draft that I set for myself is fast approaching.

As it stands now God and my family (both blood and tribe) are the two most important things.  I’m going to be trying to find different more effective ways to connect with them this year and build stronger relationships. I haven’t written that down all nicely, though.

Next will be my Novel, which means I may not get all five posts published every week. I will try hard to do that, but my main focus will be the whole reason why I write as much as I do. I want to get better and get a book I wrote into readers hands. I don’t care about having a publisher’s stamp of approval now. I just want people to read my stuff.

And I would love people to read my book. I love the story and characters. I just hope the people who will read the book, well books (it is a series), will love them just as much. I mean I see them so clearly and the story is so real to me, but I’m still making it readable and well written.

Well, that was a bit of a ramble.  Basically what I’m saying is I will be writing more and acting less. Acting will go on the back burner until I finish editing my book. I need to focus on one dream/ goal at a time.

Goal Getters Channel

Hello readers,

For a while now I’ve been writing and telling you about my goal focused channel. Well, I decided that I would share everything I’ve done with it all right here. Before I do that though, how about I tell you why I am making these videos.

I am recording steps and tips to help people reach their goals for that purpose. I want to help people reach their goals. I know that some goals are hard and others just take time. I also know that one of my biggest done falls is when I feel like I am all alone in my struggle to achieve my goals. My hope is that by showing random people there is some one out there who is willing to help them and show them my journey to reaching my goals, I will be able to support them.

Now one to the videos. First are the individual steps. Each of these videos are one out of the seven steps I follow to achieve my goals.

Step1

Step 2

Step 3

Step 4

Step 5

Step 6

Step 7

Now, that those are done I am going to be doing a bunch of tip videos and one longer video of all the steps in one video, which should be easier to watch to get the audience started.

Here are the Tip videos that I have up so far.
Tip: Focus on your behavior

Tip: Plan you week

Tip: Know Why

Okay that’s a lot of videos. I hope you readers enjoy them. I am now off to see how many creative writing posts I can do before my mind completely melts.

This week's DreamWard Bound (10/25/14)

successIt’s noon and I already want to go back to bed. I don’t want to do anything productive, even though I have a bunch of productive things I need to do today. I want to be childish and throw a tantrum so that I don’t have to do it. This is actually how I’ve been for most of the week, which caused my week to drag on and on.

I just did not want to do anything this week, so I skipped the gym almost everyday and hardly worked or even thought about my goals. It seems to be time to get revive my excitement for my goals, which I will hopefully force myself to do after this post. Thankfully I do have a list of why I want my goals already started and will just add on to it. Reminding myself why I want the goals should help me push to work on them. Of course napping is sounding good, also.

Let’s get to what I actually did this week. I wrote 3 out of the 5 creative writing posts that I wanted  to write. I did record and post a monologue. I actually recorded two last Saturday but only have gotten around to posting one at this point. I also posted the fifth step in my goal getting series.

That is actually all I did for my goals. I only thought about eating right, did not go to the gym that much and  hardly talked to my family. I really was a hermit that only wanted to sleep.

Here is the list of the poems and videos that I did actually do.

Lucy’s Monologue From While you Were Sleeping (video)

What Is My Acting Style? (video)

Step 5 (video)

I Am A Dork (Poem)

Puzzle Piece (Creative Writing piece)

Time For A Time Poem (Poem)