Friendship (A Poem)

by tiffanyPoetryPosted on 2 Comments

poetry

I cannot, will  not lead you.
I cannot, will not tell you what is right.
Yet, I will walk beside you.
Yet, I will talk with you until you see some light.

Answers will come after questions;
who asks and who answers we’ll have to decide.
Some times the conversation will be made up of facial expressions.
Still no matter what I will be on your side.

This was just a quick little poem, that actually came from one of my prompts. Which weekly prompt I do not know, so cannot link you that blog. Still, I hope you enjoy this poem.

My Writing Warrior Challenge

by tiffanyother updatesPosted on One Comment

draft1.5 011

Since my first 100 day challenge went so well, I have decided to do another. In the first challenge I focused on getting in better shape for my Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Now, since I am going to try to increase my classes I thought it would be good to challenge myself in a different aspect of my life.

This challenge will focus on my brain, more specifically editing. I already procrastinated past the deadline I gave myself. It is time to get this book’s second draft finished.

Now I am not saying I will finish editing my book in 100 days. That would stress me out more than it would be helpful.  No my writing warrior challenge is much more simple. I will edit for 20 minutes a day. Some days I will be able to edit more, but I will not edit any less. If I do I start the count over.

Unlike the other challenge I will not be logging a thought a day. I will most likely tweet more about this challenge, but not a thought every day. I am already thinking a bunch trying to edit the book.

The good news is that I’m already on day 2 with most of the 20 minutes done. That being said I will let you know how it all went 98 days from now.

Here Is A DreamWard Bound Post

by tiffanyDreamward bound, other updatesPosted on No Comments

success

Hello, reader.  I am yet again writing this later than I like. I blame the wonderful naps I took and the events I had this weekend. It started with 2 BJJ classes on Friday after work, which I followed by sushi, ice-cream, and a movie. The movie was with friends, but the sushi and ice-cream was some apparently needed me-time. It was really great to do what I wanted and enjoy spending time out and about with no one else.

On Saturday I had another BJJ class, so I’m kind of sore. I then got ready as fast I could and went to a The Gravity’s show. It was a great show and the band rocked it. The band is filled with talent musician and if you can ever listen to their stuff (cover songs) I suggest you do. Plus, they know how to be performers, so seeing one of their shows is always fun. After that fun show and having class I opened this post to write this but got as far as adding the picture before realizing I needed a nap.

Today I went to church, served, and then out for a sushi lunch with friends. Lunch was followed by another nap. I woke up and did not want to get out of bed, so now I’m writing this post around dinner time. Still, I am writing this post and that is all that really matters.

Of course, now I cannot remember what I did this week. This weekend totally erased last week I guess, which is good. I will start this coming week refreshed and with a clean slate.

I do know that between eating right and having 2.5 hours of BJJ on Friday I am on the downward trend with my weight. I started at 183 and now am at 176.

I am also listening to at least Air1 at least going to my carpool, which is my 10 minutes of listening/ learning about God. This week since I am driving in by myself I do plan on listening to audio books for the 45 minute (or more) drive.

As for my goal about posting 5 times a week, well I haven’t found the right schedule for that. Also it seems like I need to make a new deadline for my second draft completion for my novel. I just haven’t been able to sit and write or edit these past weeks. This is why they are goals though. I am working towards getting my second draft done and writing 5 creative posts a week.

I did write some this week, so here are the posts.

Weekly Writing prompt

Over 3/4th of the way to 100

Why Do I  Love You?

I hope you enjoy my writing.

Why do I love you?

by tiffanyBrazilian Jiu-jitsu writings, monologuePosted on 3 Comments

writing

 

I find myself asking why do I love you? I know you’d never ask. You’re just happy that I do and I am very happy that there is love between us. Still I ask myself why do I love you? What makes you so special in my eyes? How did I get so enthralled with you so fast?

My answer to myself is because you are a challenge where I can learn something new with each visit. You push me to be my better than my best and some how at the same time you show me that I am better than I thought. You show me that I can achieve more than I thought I could but show me that it’s a journey that I just started. You give me confidence even when I am beaten down. The best thing is that you don’t let me give up because you know I can do more and when I do do more I am all the better for being pulled through it.

After our time together I find myself getting stares and I am not completely aware as to why. It could be because you make me feel beautiful especially when my hair is a mess, so I go out looking a bit crazy. It could be because of the giant smile you put on my face. Either way I will happily accept the stares if it means that they are seeing a fragment of you.

You are becoming my happy place and a shield of protection even when I am not in my comfort zone.

So yes you can kick my butt, choke me out and twist my arm along with any other body part because Jiu-Jitsu you give me so much and I learn every time I am hurt.

Thank you for being hard and pushing me. Thank you for breaking me away from my comfort zone and showing me that I am tougher than I think. Most of all though Thank you for teaching me about a different side of myself and giving me new journey to explore. Thank you Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu for being awesome.

Inside Thoughts

by tiffanyPoetryPosted on One Comment

writing

 

The words are bubbling. They are brewing. I once danced with them on the beach with the setting sun. Now the moon reigns and the words are a mush of over cooked strew. They are just bubbling and brewing no longer dancing in my mind.

The beautiful melody of fantastic descriptions and deep pondering has left my side. I now sit wishing and wanting for the words I needed to say to arise again. I wait for them to dance out of the sludge like stew that is now taking over my mind.

Tiredness slows down my thoughts and the need for sleep mixes all of them together. At sunset with the cool breeze whispering words to me, my mind was perfectly poetic as it pondered a pure poem.  Now only random ramblings can be rattled off as the stew thickens and traps the dancing melody of the pure poem inside.

Better Late Than Never For DreamWard Bound

by tiffanyDreamward boundPosted on No Comments

success

I figure writing my weekly update post is better late than not doing one. I will make it quick though, since I actually already did write this week’s post. My computer just decided that the internet wasn’t its friend though and for some reason would not save the post. It could also be the site, but more likely my computer, since its old and filled up with a bunch of different projects.

I did awesome with my God goal and listened to at least an hour of an audiobook about God centered things every day this week.  I also did pretty well with my weight/ fitness goal. I realized that I’m starting to see definition and I have lost 5 lbs since starting to actually weigh myself and try.

I didn’t do so great with editing my novel, since I was planning on doing that yesterday. Instead though I got the pleasure of staying in bed with a killer headache. Basically my Saturday was me waking up at 8 drinking a bunch of water, having breakfast and going to class with a slight headache. The Friday night ratio of whiskey to water may have been a bit off, since I had whiskey but no water the entire night of dancing. I thought I would be fine but after a full Brazilian Jit-Jitsu class I was not feeling well at all. I went home, showered, and went back to bed. I slept most of the day and then went out to a birthday dinner.  Needless to say I did not get any editing done this weekend.

I would have worked on writing or editing today, but I had another birthday party to go to after Church today. This week I should be able to write and edit. I look forward to at least one night this week sitting down working on things.  I did fix my break light this weekend, so I was productive. It’s not as productive as I usually am, but that break light has been out for months.

Now, I will leave you with the two things I posted this week. This next week should be more. At least I hope this next week I will post more.

Bury Deep

Weekly Writing Prompt

Bury Deep (A Poem)

by tiffanyPoetryPosted on One Comment

poetry

I battle with you
as if the war was needed;
as if I had no feet to stand on.

You tear me down
and I let you,
and I feel defeated.

You whisper awful thing
like I’m not really loved;
like I cannot stand on my own

My heart and happiness is real
but you tell me to ignore it;
but you tell I’m ignorant.

You know my every weakness
and you use it for my harm,
and you use it to keep me down.

But I am strong,
stronger than the war you wage
the defeat you push
the hateful whispers
and stronger than your lies.

I know if you were anyone else
I would push you away
spit in your face
or just turn my back.

If you were anyone else
I would be stronger,
but you are the little voice
the one the is buried deep
trying for weakness to keep.

I can not spit in your face
or turn my back.
I can not push you down
or choke you out.

Yet, there is this little box
it has a lock.
You little voice can go in that
and be buried very deep.

Where you say I’m a fatty
I choice to see a beauty.
Where you see hurt
I see my healing.
You see struggle as failure
I see it as a lesson.
Where you see loneliness
I see self-love.

So go in your little box
and I lock you up.
I will bury you deep
because your lies I don’t want to keep.

A New DreamWard Bound Post

by tiffanyDreamward boundPosted on No Comments

success

This week was a good week. I posted a few extra poems this week and wasn’t too stressed at work. I also planned out my normal weeks today. I am slowly getting back on track with being productive. I am also going to sit down, either today or tomorrow, and look at my goals. I need to take time to actually look at my goals and decide how I what I want my goals to be.  Time is a resource that I am lacking these days.

On another note, I am seeing improvements with my Brazilian Jiu Jitsu skills. This is funny to say, since I am a white belt, which means I have every little skills. Yet, I am improving. I can do things I haven’t been able to do and learning how to move my body and my partners body in order to get submissions or escapes. I know I’m still far from my blue belt, but it’s a journey and I can seeing the steps I’m taking moving me towards the first goals.

That is really all I have to say about my week. I did not do anything too excited, so I will leave you with my list of things I wrote.

Pairs Of Two

A Needed Poem

Weekly Writing Prompt

Not An Ordinary Walk

by tiffanymy creative self, short stories, Stand Alone Short StoriesPosted on No Comments

encouragement

I walk down a hard grey path that has tiny bumps that would be unpleasant to walk barefooted on. There are dwelling places on both sides of this path with some green ground coverings. I walk down until I see an artificial looking hill that uses a combination of flat surfaces and tiny smooth cliffs. I walk down this built hill and find that the land below it is different.

This land has no path and is not as solid as the path or artificial hill.  Tiny grains of tan, white, and brown move under my feet as I walk. I am moving the land under me as I hear a rhythm of strange movement. There is a massive body of liquid creating this musical noise. The liquid mass stretches far beyond my sight and moves up as it sounds its rumbling music, but then it is pulled away. I pause and the clear liquid rushes over my feet. It is cold and I do not dare go in any further. Although what rushed over my feet was clear as the volume grows it becomes hard to see the ground or what is in the liquid.

I stay on the moving land before going back to the artificial hill and down the grey path.

Another DreamWard Bound

by tiffanyDreamward boundPosted on No Comments

success

Right now, it is hard for me to recap this week as far as it goes in my journey towards my dreams and life goals. Instead of going into my goals, like I did last week I will simply recap what I did this pass week.

I had Monday off from work,so I did write a little and got to chapter 2 in editing my book. Only being on chapter 2 might seem like I’ve not been doing anything with the book. As I am writing it down I am having that thought at least. I’ve been working on this book for over a year. I think it is actually closer to two years since I started writing it.I should be further along right? Well I did do a full sweep a while back and took notes on a few chapters. There is also an outline of the full series and notes on characters, races and the town. So, as you can see I have worked on it. Of course, I am also a procrastinator and that has come into play with my editing. Still, I am working on the book, it is just slow going.

On Monday I was also able to write 2 post which meant  I met my new blog goal for the week. I actually posted 3 posts last week, which I am happy about. Before the new year I would be beating myself up, feeling guilty, and not happy that I only got 3 posts, with one of them being a DreamWard Bound post. Now, I am smiling though. I got 3 posts out to the public.

On Monday I also went to my BJJ class and hung out with my friends after class. It was a full yet relaxing day off.

When Tuesday came around I had to go back to work. I drove over the hill with my friends, but listened to my podcast, which is a goal of mine to do. I also had a Bible study after work.

Wednesday was work and hanging out for dinner with a few friends.

Thursday I led my improv class after work.

Friday was my nerd night, which ran long since it was our last D&D for  a while, since our game master is living in Ireland now.

This, Saturday, morning I went to another BJJ class then had lunch at the Windmill, which is my favorite cafe. I then took a walk on the beach, did laundry and took a nap. Now I am writing this post trying to sit in a way that my soreness from the class does not affect me too much. It was a great class to say the least.

Here are the links to the two posts I wrote after the last DreamWard Bound post.

Weekly Writing Prompt

The Bagel Love Affair.